Getting some?

I'm not a fan of any sort of "self pity" jokes. I'm guilty of making them myself, and I always feel like a total douche afterwards. When appropriate, or able for that matter, I apologize.

Some side info, I have never lived alone. I've always wanted to, but never got the chance to. So all of my experiences typically involve another person who I have lived with. Since living with said individuals, I always seem to over analyze their behavior, moods, and so forth. Doing this, I've become more aware of my own. Early on, I would keep the observations to myself. I'd desperately dissect every detail all in my head until I had depleted every single drop of energy from the situation. But now thanks to the wonders of the internet, I blog about it - occasionally.

Ahem.

As I typed away just minutes ago, Woods peeped into my space to inform me about the adventures of the our galpal whom I shall refer to as GoodPussy. Once he was done giving me the exploits of her latest sexual escapade, he made a comment how she is getting nailed hard and he currently as in "right at the moment" is not (insert self-pity/sarcastic tone). Soon I feel the weight is put onto my shoulders as if I am the only person who can solve his dilemma. So my response to that is to shut down emotionally and not say a word. I turn from looking at him and focus my attention to my computer screen. My emotions seem to rush rather quickly - the outcome: annoyance. He seems to notice the mood change so he asks what I am doing, and what time I will be to bed. I give him a brisk answer of "soon". He leaves.

I know I interpreted his comment incorrectly as he was making a joke, but as I mentioned before, I am not a big fan of this type of humor. I believe that there is always some truth in those quips. Timofy was notorious for using them. And my reaction to his use of them was rebellion in any shape, way or form.

As I mentioned in my previous post, it's all about meditation so I will meditate to release these harsh feelings I have at this time. I know Woods is only horned up (as always) and was just curious as to what time I will be going to bed as it is rather late. I just want to make sure there are no hidden meanings behind any silly little comments because honestly I through with having to read through bullshit via the gem that is uncomfortable faux-laughter.

*sigh*

Welcoming Frustration

Waking up completely flustered is never a good thing. As I type, I feel so worked up. I can't believe that I've allowed myself to become overwhelmed to this degree. As much I am chalking this up to my irresponsible nature, I know that it's not as bad as it seems. Maybe I am PMSing?

The list of grievances is probably a mile long. The situations range from the painting of the living quarters to my sleeping & eating schedule to the dumbfucks at the gym's pool to my finances - which there are none. All of this issues are fixable. I just need to calm myself down.

*meditation*

I used to meditate quite a bit in my early twenties anytime something got the best of me. As I got older I've become less tolerable - to the point where I let any little shit problem sneak it's way under my skin. Maybe I will bring back the meditation more frequently to see how it affects my vibe. I was relying on the gym to cleanse all of the negativities from my head, but lately those ass wipes at the pool, as I mentioned before, have contributed to the antagonization of my well being.

*meditation*

I think it's working. Now if I could only remember that Tina Turner chant from "What's Love Got To Do With It". Doe-rae-mae-een-gee-oh. Much better.

Now if that chant can help me get a job, or better yet, a quick 300 dollars so I can snapped up some CDs from the perfectbeat.com VIP sale, I would be the happiest father fucker this side of Hancock Park.

*crossing fingers*

No Flogging Zone

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Missing Trigger

I have returned from Arizona safe and sound.

I drove the Pickle Wagon throughout the late/early morning hours all by myself (and my musica) while Woods followed behind in the brand new truck tentatively named Klouse (inside joke). I will admit that I very muched enjoyed my trip back alone. It reminded me of the days when I used discover Tucson in my dark green 1981 Toyota pick-up (Trigger) after I would get out of working the late shift at the hotel. The trips were always well stocked with a stack of CDs to listen to. Sometimes I would mouth the words along with the song while other times I would be in deep thought with the tune blaring in the background. This type of activity became habit around the time I was coming to terms with my public gayness (or as the community likes to call it "coming out of the closet"). I spent many nights driving around the town, even sometimes parking in remote areas of the city just looking at the night sky wishing I was somewhere else. Many times I longed for a connection with someone who understood me.

I did try to recreate those driving moments in San Diego a few times, but it didn't work out. I plan to do that here in Los Angeles once I am working and have a vehicle of my own. There is something therapeutic about driving, listening to music and being alone with your thoughts. I just hope the revival of those types of drives comes sooner rather than later.

Hello Southwest!

I'm jet setting out to my hometown with Woods later today. I'm playing travel companion as he has plans to get his hands on a truck at a dealership out there. While he is busy with that, I plan to eat, visit the fam, eat, see some mates, and well, eat. That is about all I basically do when I am in Tucson.

Some may think it's a bit crazy to go all the way to Arizona to purchase a vehicle, especially during this recession, but Woods could not locate the specific truck he was looking for. Luckily for him, there is one (or will be one) waiting for him when we arrive.

Woods and myself are part of a dying breed of drivers who prefer a stick over an automatic - take that as you will. Unfortunately, the bastards-that-be here in California don't fancy manual transmissions. All the soccer moms with their SUVs can't handle manuals while chatting on the phone and drinking their designer coffees. Whiny bitches - always ruining it for the rest of us.

I guess there was a upside to growing up in the southern part of Arizona - manual transmission trucks and Eegee's. Mmmm. And now Woods can enjoy them as well.

Boot Camp Fantasies?

Something tells me that trash talking slut Timofy would love this:

Slumbering no more

Wow, are people actually opening their eyes and realizing that religion is another form of keeping the masses in check? Maybe so. Check out this article from Yahoo:

More Americans say they have no religion

A wide-ranging study on American religious life found that the Roman Catholic population has been shifting out o of the Northeast to the Southwest, the percentage of Christians in the nation has declined and more people say they have no religion at all.

Fifteen percent of respondents said they had no religion, an increase from 14.2 percent in 2001 and 8.2 percent in 1990, according to the American Religious Identification Survey.

Northern New England surpassed the Pacific Northwest as the least religious region, with Vermont reporting the highest share of those claiming no religion, at 34 percent. Still, the study found that the numbers of Americans with no religion rose in every state.

"No other religious bloc has kept such a pace in every state," the study's authors said.

In the Northeast, self-identified Catholics made up 36 percent of adults last year, down from 43 percent in 1990. At the same time, however, Catholics grew to about one-third of the adult population in California and Texas, and one-quarter of Floridians, largely due to Latino immigration, according to the research.

Nationally, Catholics remain the largest religious group, with 57 million people saying they belong to the church. The tradition gained 11 million followers since 1990, but its share of the population fell by about a percentage point to 25 percent.

Christians who aren't Catholic also are a declining segment of the country.

In 2008, Christians comprised 76 percent of U.S. adults, compared to about 77 percent in 2001 and about 86 percent in 1990. Researchers said the dwindling ranks of mainline Protestants, including Methodists, Lutherans and Episcopalians, largely explains the shift. Over the last seven years, mainline Protestants dropped from just over 17 percent to 12.9 percent of the population.

The report from The Program on Public Values at Trinity College in Hartford, Conn., surveyed 54,461 adults in English or Spanish from February through November of last year. It has a margin of error of plus or minus 0.5 percentage points. The findings are part of a series of studies on American religion by the program that will later look more closely at reasons behind the trends.

The current survey, being released Monday, found traditional organized religion playing less of a role in many lives. Thirty percent of married couples did not have a religious wedding ceremony and 27 percent of respondents said they did not want a religious funeral.

About 12 percent of Americans believe in a higher power but not the personal God at the core of monotheistic faiths. And, since 1990, a slightly greater share of respondents — 1.2 percent — said they were part of new religious movements, including Scientology, Wicca and Santeria.

The study also found signs of a growing influence of churches that either don't belong to a denomination or play down their membership in a religious group.

Respondents who called themselves "non-denominational Christian" grew from 0.1 percent in 1990 to 3.5 percent last year. Congregations that most often use the term are megachurches considered "seeker sensitive." They use rock style music and less structured prayer to attract people who don't usually attend church. Researchers also found a small increase in those who prefer being called evangelical or born-again, rather than claim membership in a denomination.

Evangelical or born-again Americans make up 34 percent of all American adults and 45 percent of all Christians and Catholics, the study found. Researchers found that 18 percent of Catholics consider themselves born-again or evangelical, and nearly 39 percent of mainline Protestants prefer those labels. Many mainline Protestant groups are riven by conflict over how they should interpret what the Bible says about gay relationships, salvation and other issues.

The percentage of Pentecostals remained mostly steady since 1990 at 3.5 percent, a surprising finding considering the dramatic spread of the tradition worldwide. Pentecostals are known for a spirited form of Christianity that includes speaking in tongues and a belief in modern-day miracles.

Mormon numbers also held steady over the period at 1.4 percent of the population, while the number of Jews who described themselves as religiously observant continued to drop, from 1.8 percent in 1990 to 1.2 percent, or 2.7 million people, last year. Researchers plan a broader survey on people who consider themselves culturally Jewish but aren't religious.

The study found that the percentage of Americans who identified themselves as Muslim grew to 0.6 percent of the population, while growth in Eastern religions such as Buddhism slightly slowed.

Why don't you sigh with me...

*sigh*

Today was one of those days where I knew I shouldn't have gotten out of bed. I could use the excuse that our clocks here in California jumped ahead one hour, thank you daylight savings time, but I won't be exercising that reasoning today. To be honest, I feel like shit. Not sickly, but kind of that icky feeling due to a headache, stomach issues, acne (yes, acne), and dare I say it, too much ass-fucking.

Why there is no such thing as too much fucking, there is a thing called giving your ass a rest. I'm not saying that I took an endless supply of meat recently or anything of that sort, but sometimes having it once two nights in a row can be a bit exhausting on my virgin-like manhole - save your comments. Needless to say, it's off limits for a couple of days. I'm taking a sabbatical from bottoming until I feel I am up to the task of being nailed by a thick lengthy tool.

*sigh* once more.

Looking beyond that situation, I am hoping that my post-gym Burger King Coke Icee will kill the headache, the food I am about to consume will smooth my stomach turns, and the medication will clear up what became of my face after my two consecutive Fridays of hosting that gutter whore Toxic Waist. That skank seriously needs to lay off the heavy make-up. It's not like she is working on the corner of Santa Monica and Highland, but then again that would be a job at least.

*sigh* yet again.