Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Not Quite Wildness

Unfortunately I didn't make it over to Wildness last evening because my bitch ass was asleep by 11pm. I really wanted to go, but apparently my body was barking orders at me to get some shuteye. And I rightfully did... a whopping 11 hours of beauty rest - lawd knows I needed it.

Tonight is the Selene Luna & Nadya Ginsburg show at the Cavern Club Theatre in Silverlake. I will definitely be attending that. It's on the earlier side with a showtime of 8pm in comparison to Wildness where the usual performance begins sometime around 12:30am. I love me some late night entertainment, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find the energy to stay up late everynight. At least it's a win-win situation with this evening's plans... one great show + two bowls of Albondigas post show = pure heaven.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Recovering Tuesdays

Last night I ventured down to Mustache Mondays with Woods to visually feast on the usual hipsters, queens, lezbots, and all those stuck in-between. But the main course for the evening was to check out The Girl Is Tough, who was visiting from Mexico (Swine Flu!), and the one & only House Of Xtravaganza. As always, Hector and his crew did not disappoint.

I haven't been out to MM in a while, not since BJ was visiting actually, so I haven't been exposed to any of the new club lingo/fashions/bullshit/tunes of late. To my surprise Hector Xtravaganza worked the crowd to Chelley's "Took The Night" - a banging new (as in new for me anyway) club anthem that is quite reminiscent of the songs used back in the old school vogueing days.

While researching the song online, I came across this...



Holy shit, that queen on the right is serving it up! WORK!

Personal mental thought: that queen looks like a PBDA (Pudgy Big Dick'd Asian) from my gym. Only he has a highly spruced up hair do that just screams out loud "oh-yes-I-did-bitch!"

Anyway, tonight is all about Wildness. I'm going to text Army to see if he wants to attend. Woods is confirmed. We are going to pop in for a bit to take a gander at Alice Cunt's performance. She told me last night when I saw her at MM to bring a flashlight, and something metal to bang on. Oh my, this should be quite interesting.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Yawnchella + The Same Old Tired Connection

Last night was a bust. Ok, not completely, but I ended up calling it a night much earlier than I had anticipated.

The plan was to hit the gym, come home to eat dinner, then saunter over to the grand re-opening of Hot Dog. I was able to successfully complete an upper-body work out in about 45 minutes despite the fact I arrived at 7:30pm. I was shooting to arrive at the gym no later than 6pm. Damn facial hair. But at least arriving at that time it allowed me to be witness to a rather quick show (*cough*) in the shower area from a fellow gym go-er. That lead to what I like to call “shower speak” after once he finished himself off. He smiled at me, giggled, then asked me from across the shower bay what I was doing the upcoming evening. I told him I was going out with friends. As he exited his stall, he dried off right in front of me, sneaking in looks of my man goodies every chance he got. As he left, he smiled again, added a head nod and I reciprocated. A craigslist missed connection? Highly unlikely.

Onto to the second part of the evening which included dinner that was made up from leftovers. Add a romp through DVR Land, and you have the makings of a happy Whip.

Sadly, it all came to a halt after the food sank in. As Woods feel asleep, I got a bit lagged myself, but I was determined not to fall under the “food coma” spell. I did my best from closing my eyes, but by the time midnight rolled around, I didn’t have it in me to get all jazzed up for a night out on the town. I guess I will have to wait until next weekend to explore my social observations. *sigh*

On the flip side, something quite lovely has happened. My stomach issues have seemed to settle down, my headaches are not as frequent, and I was able to last the entire day without wanting to sneak in a nap. It feels like my schedule is finally turning around. I was even in bed by 3am. I would have been in bed much sooner, but I had some prior commitments I needed to honor before laying my head down.

Regardless of the new refreshing schedule, the lurkings from technology’s deepest corners still seems to be with us...

Ah yes, another day without an internet connection. The beginnings of a pattern I do not like. Unfortunately I cannot call to complain as I am not listed on the bill. I don’t like to nag, but I’ve whined to Woods numerous times to phone AT&T and ask to speak to a supervisor. This is unacceptable on AT&T’s end. My question is “why would you pay for a service that is becoming more and more unreliable?”

When BJ was staying here, we had trouble with the cable for close to three weeks. No one bothered to call AT&T. And this type of internet connection disturbance is now considered routine. It’s like clockwork. You can count on it happening at least three to four times a month. I am so not impressed with this FIOS bullshit.

Oh, how I miss the cable modem.

I feel slightly odd bitching about the service as I don’t actually pay for it. Hopefully once I have safely landed a steady job, I will be able to contribute my earnings to the pot. Then I will be able to let loose the fury when I am unhappy with the way it is rolling out. I just get really worked up in these types of situations.

So I guess I’m stuck with having to head over to the Larchmont to use the shotty Wi-Fi at Peet’s or Coffee Bean. What an inconvenience. On the bright side, maybe I will be able to spot Diane Keaton in her clunky work boots shimmering around the village. Gorge.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

One Day At A Time...

I'm fuming right now.

*meditation*

The main reason why I'm so upset is the past week has been complete shit. To be honest, it's been mostly a blur due to the fact that I have been trying to rearrange my sleep schedule. I'm doing my best to get my body used to going to bed no later than 2am, then being up sometime between 8am and 10am. This may sound frivolous, but considering the hours I have kept over the past few years, this has been seriously hard on me.

I've felt like a zombie all week. I've been coming in and out of consciousness as I slept the majority of the days. I've skipped meals and workouts... not to mention other responsibilities I had. I feel so out of touch. And that enrages me. I hate not being in control.

I do know that this rearrangement will benefit me in the long run. I can't continue to keep the schedule I have become accustomed to if I want to get back to work/school and make progress here at home. The sleeping regiment I have had was not healthy so I needed to take action.

I can tell that my body is having a hard time adjusting to the new regiment thanks to the many aches and pains I have experienced over the past 48 hours. My stomach is on full roller coaster mode. My muscles are weak. My head has been pounding at various times of the day. By no means exciting. But I have to get through it. I keep reminding myself what my goals are. And those are my number one priority.

Wow, I sound like a drug addict in a 12 step program.

As I look out my window, I see that it is a gorgeous day. I am deciding on a plan of attack. I have laundry to finish, papers to sort, and a bathroom to clean. And once I am done with that, I will tackle the closest, bedroom, and dining room. So much to accomplish, so little time. But I know I can do it. But once I begin the process, the possibilities are endless.

Now if I can just get over the fact that I lost a much sought after item I physically won on eBay because of the fucking internet connection that has been down, then I will progress just fine. But I can still be pissed at AT&T for their constant screw-ups with the cable and internet. If one of their employees was here, I would gladly slap the taste out of their mouth.

*mediation*

Monday, April 20, 2009

The Sunshine Has Returned!

Today's forecast: 98 degrees here at the house. And since the city limits of Los Angeles is typically 10 degrees warmer than the beach, particularly Santa Monica that is, that means only one thing: time to lay out!

I'm just minutes away from heading out to Santa Monica Beach. It's damn hot today, and I am loving it. I cannot wait until the summer to begin so I can spend my free time hanging out at the beach. I've spent too much time here in California not enjoying the coast line. So this year, one of my goals is to take in as much of the beach as I can.

I'm off to work on that Speedo tan line - what a fucking homo I am! Here's to hoping that I don't return with a sunburn.

*crosses fingers*

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Me Finished With April 18th

Me had a wonderful day.

Me enjoyed SoCal Zombie Walk in the morning.

Me absolutely loved Fangoria Weekend Of Horrors.

Me thankful for having a buddy to share the experience of FWOH.

Me has new respect for Clive Barker.

Me totally impressed with Ashley Laurence.

Me has sad face that me didn't get a chance to actually have a full work out at the gym.

Me has a bit of a frown due to "certain issues".

Me knows for a fact that the "certain issues" will repair themselves within a couple days.

Me a bit upset that me got cockblocked at gym.

Me shouts "fuck you trolls".

Me happy that me got to see LadyA.

Me pleased with "Laid To Rest".

Me gitty that the screening of "Laid To Rest" was complimentary.

Me quite exhausted.

Me thinking of what to do next.

Me is contemplating on having a light snack.

Me is actually ready to call it a night.

Me has trouble with the decision because me kind of wants a bit of food in his tummy.

Me tells himself to "hurry up & finalize it fucker!".

Me reaches a conclusion.

Me heads off to bed now.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Macca Vs. Leatherface


Normally I would have been in the Palm Springs area right now getting myself ready to head over to the Empire Polo Fields to begin a three day binge of live musical acts, frozen lemonades infused with smuggled-in Stoli, and loaded baked potatoes from Señor Corn at the notoriously over-hyped Coachella music festival. But due to my status of unemployment, I am not able to attend this year.

All is not lost tho as I will more than likely have the chance to see the majority of the scheduled acts I would have enjoyed to see there at the festival here in my home turf of Los Angeles. It seems that this city is a definite pit stop for any well-known, and not-so-well-known, performers from all over the globe. Especially if they want to make a splash in America. Living in the entertainment capital of the world has its perks.

And speaking of perks, me not going to Coachella has opened up a door that I have been lusting to explore for many, many years. Since I am in town this weekend, I will FINALLY be able to attend the Fangoria Weekend Of Horrors that takes place downtown beginning this afternoon. Granted I will only be going for one day tomorrow, but that will provide me with enough horror-loving good times to keep me happy for weeks to come. Talk about a silver lining.

I have been a lover of horror films since I was a young lad. I remember watching "A Nightmare On Elm Street" and the original "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" with both of my parents when I was a kid. I was fortunate to have parents that embraced all facets of my personality. I was obsessed with anything related to the macabre - from the Halloween holiday, to gore films, to Elvira - it was completely fine with them.

Altho I will admit, as a child I hated the look of legendary rock band KISS - don't ask me why, I just did. Any photos of Gene Simmons in face scared the shit out of me. You would think for someone into watching a movie where zombies chew through a victim's rib cage KISS would be on the low end of the freak out factor. Nope. I was terrified anytime I laid eyes on photos of that group. Hell, just ask my mom about that time I ran out of Sam Goody's because of a KISS group standee back in the early 80's. Regardless, my fear of them changed when I hit my teens. I guess the development of pubic hair allowed me to get over my anxiety. Yay for me.

Anyhoo, as I prepare myself to soak in all that awaits tomorrow I say "fuck you Coachella with your hipsters, hippies, and b-rate celebs... even you Sir Paul McCartney - that asswipe", and "hello fan-boys, gore-geeks, goth-wannabes, and those who believe they are real life zombies... I can't wait to party with all of you freaks!".

Monday, April 13, 2009

How Much For That Puppy In The Window?

I want to know what in the hell those crazy bastards at PETA are smoking, drinking, or snorting. After I read the article I have listed down below, I wondered to myself just how mentally unbalanced are those folk over at every one's favorite animal rights advocacy group. Seriously, I honestly want to know.

Pet Shop Boys spurn rescue shelter remix

LONDON (AFP) – Electro-pop pioneers Pet Shop Boys turned down a request from animal rights group PETA Europe to adopt a more creature-friendly name, the band revealed on their website Thursday.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals suggested Neil Tennant and Chris Lowe rename themselves Rescue Shelter Boys to draw attention to the plight of animals raised in pet shops.

"Dear Neil and Chris, You have many loyal fans of the Pet Shop Boys here at PETA. Will you please consider changing your name from the Pet Shop Boys to the Rescue Shelter Boys?" pleaded a letter to the group from Yvonne Taylor, PETA's special projects manager.

"Most dogs and cats sold in pet shops are sourced from profit-hungry breeders who may have bred them in cramped, filthy conditions.

"For every bird who reaches a pet shop, three others have died during capture, confinement and transportation.

"Hamsters, mice and other rodents are often bred by the pet shops themselves, leading to inbreeding, genetic weaknesses, physical deformities and behavioral disorders.

"By agreeing to change your name to the Rescue Shelter Boys, you would help raise awareness about the cruelty involved in the pet trade and encourage your millions of fans to consider giving a home to an abandoned or unwanted animal from an animal shelter. So, what do you say?"

The pair, whose hits include "West End Girls", It's a Sin" and "Suburbia" declined the request, claiming they were "unable to agree," but said it "raises an issue worth thinking about.

I'm all for treating animals with respect, but are you fucking kidding me? Am I not aware that merely speaking the group name Pet Shop Boys invokes some kind of subliminal message?

I think PETA is scrapping the bottom of the barrel here. Maybe they need to focus their energy on making a bigger impact through education rather than spending precious time sending out a bullshit request like this one to PSB. I think their efforts would be better suited that way, instead of always trying to get themselves in the entertainment news. Sounds like their PR train is losing it's steam. Finally.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Peeps This!

Happy Zombie Jesus Day!

Toxic Waist was out in full force last night at Dragstrip complete with an Easter basket. She was accompanied by Woods - who was channeling the Folsom Street Fair circa 2008 with an addition of a terrifying dungeon mask. Some Dragstrippers got wet by it, while others ran for the hills in fear of getting spanked. Definitely hot either way you slice it.

You can judge for yourselves right here...


Now that I got my much needed 12 hours of beauty rest, it's time to color some eggs. And by coloring eggs, I mean vegging out by eating dinner in front of the television while watching the last few Season 1 episodes of Dexter. And for the record, I have no interest in coloring, hiding, or hunting for eggs. Toxic Waist did all three of those things last night. That slag.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Bust Out The Lavender Hanky

Be there tonight.


Why? Because Toxic Waist says "Fuck The White Party!".

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Realness

All I can say is "wow".

Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.

There is no other word I can think of to express my emotion regarding last night's opening of Canden Mason/Big Art Group's latest work "SOS".

My interest in the show was peaked after seeing a very small excerpt at Wildness on Tuesday evening which was mentioned in the last post. After a brief discussion with Woods, we both decided it would be good idea to see this production. It did help that we were able to obtain discount admission - all thanks to Wildness. And you know how much I love a bargain!

From the minute it started right up until the end, I was reeling in amazement of this multimedia extravaganza. My senses were in complete overload. I couldn't help myself from studying the technical aspects of the production - from the usage of filtering the backgrounds to the placement of the black screens behind two of the performers. I was highly impressed with the way it was executed. I'm having a tough time putting the majority of my thoughts into words right now so I will end this paragraph saying that "SOS" is utterly genius.

Maybe you should just check out the YouTube clip here to see what I am talking about:



This is the type of work that always gets me inspired to create something of my own. I hope I will be able to conceive some kind of piece involving that hot mess Toxic Waist or her trailer park trash step-brother Gregg Ruled. I feel so motivated to do something outrageous. And lucky for me, I might be able to actually do something about it this weekend since Dragstrip66 is on Saturday night. Now that is realness.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Big Collective Yawn

Yesterday was a bust in the "get shit done" department. I started the day with some orange juice, but it never really took off the way I had imagined it the night before.

My first errand of the day died in my lap once arriving at the location after a grueling journey in traffic. Getting to that locale at that time caused me not be able to complete the second errand I had on my list. Growl. I felt that there was no use of continuing the madness so I did my best to stop myself from becoming over saturated with fury by chanting in some relaxing vibes. Seemed to work as the rest of the day/evening went swimmingly.

I was fed well, hit the gym, and even partook in some artfag performances at Wildness before calling it a night. I originally planned not to go out, but since I came across the Wildness bulletin on MySpace that Big Art Group, Hecuba, and Diamond Lil were scheduled to perform, I had to make an effort to go down to one of the most unique nights in all of LaLaLand. I mean, how could you NOT want to see Diamond Lil... look at these photos:




Fucking amazing. I loved every minute of it.

Truth be told, I'm still in awe from all of the performances last night. Wildness should be the destination on any visiting tranny/artfag/lezbot/hipster/artist's schedule from here to, well, anywhere - sadly, I couldn't think of a cute little quip to finish that off. Boo. Regardless, any night that incorporates eclectic musical DJing, performance art, and a help yourself free tostada bar in a seriously hardcore Mexican tranny dive situated in Koreatown gets my vote as the place to be on Tuesday evenings. Plus there's no cover. Sold!

Well, today is looking swell so far. I'm just moments away from having my orange juice, multi-vitamin, & banana. Then I plan to run those two errands this morning that I had yet to accomplish on Monday and Tuesday. If all goes well with them, I will do some house chores, have a fulfilling upper body workout, eat dinner at a decent time, feast my senses at the Big Art Group show at REDCAT this evening, and get to bed at a respectable time. In that case, you can consider my fingers crossed for all of that to go smoothly.

*crossed fingers* x 1,000

Monday, April 06, 2009

Aren't You Glad You're Abstinent?

If I was wearing a mood ring right now, the color I would be sporting would be a shit stained brown. My aura is quite foul at the moment. My reasoning for being such a twat: I don't feel well, and have since late last night.

So what has caused me to feel so ill you ask? Well, I will tell you: too much cock. No surprise there as cock, as well as ass, is always getting me into trouble. Don't consider that a complaint. I'm quite pleased that I can turn a few tricks now and then, but anytime I have myself a dick sandwich (thanks Adele) one of those "bottom of the television screen warning flash notices" makes it way through my mind telling me to step away from the penis. Do I listen? Hell nah.

Well my punishment this time around is dealing with a cold. After a warehouse party last weekend and a sex party this past weekend, I'm sure I crossed paths with someone who was getting over a cold, had a cold, had the beginnings of a cold, or some other crap. Now I've got the deal with this, and it ain't pretty.

I feel terrible that my attitude is less than cheerful, but there is nothing I can do right now to change it. I didn't get much sleep last night, I woke up too early, I didn't get to the gym like I wanted to, I wore the cargos with a rip in it that only got larger as the day went on, I didn't run an errand I planned to do today... damn, make that two errands I didn't do today - I didn't stop by the post office! Argh.

I spent the majority of the day with Woods, his mum, and his visiting brother. I put my acting skills to the test as I turned on the joyous banter and upbeat smiles even though I was mentally & physically weak. But the minute I got into the car for the drive home, I returned to my earlier-in-the-morning troll status. I even denied myself the chance to go out to see some tragic drag performances this evening. And you know how much I love me some tragic drag performances.

*sigh*

At least tomorrow is a brand new day. I'll start with some Orange Juice and go from there. I do hope things start to turn around as most days recently seem like they have been filled with missed opportunities, and a never ending growing list of grievances. I will do my best to change that color of my mood ring. The goal: a joyful sky blue. But at this point I would settle for a content piss-on-me yellow.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Happiness Comes From All Directions

There are three things that got me tickled pink this morning...

Number 1: Still beaming from the sex party I attended last night. I got off twice so I think that always has a healing effect a day or two afterwards. And it helped that the crowd was quite sociable - hanging with some old buddies, and making a couple of new ones (especially the gent with the tats). And the "popper incident" commentaries - oh, those were genius to say the least.

Number 2: Coming across this little quip regarding the idiots in charge at GM:

Toyota Prius. While GM was spending $1 billion to build up the Hummer franchise, Toyota was spending $1 billion to develop a high-mileage hybrid—even though gas prices were still low. After the Prius debuted in the United States in 2000, GM execs seized yet another opportunity to display their intimate knowledge of American consumers, arguing that hybrids didn't make economic sense and that only environmentalists would buy them. Today, Toyota can barely keep up with demand for the Prius, and it has plans to start building them in the United States. GM, meanwhile, is scrambling to rush hybrids and other high-mileage cars into dealerships—far too late.

All I could do is laugh while reading that. Greedy, arrogant American automakers = shitheads.

Number 3: Catching an eyeful of this:

www.meinspace.com/bruno

There is only one word I can think of... WORK!

Saturday, April 04, 2009

2 Moms 1 Day

It was a smashing success. Woods' mum left A2 with a smile. That may have been the two glasses of pre-dinner champagne or the single glass of wine during dinner illuminating her face, but regardless it was a good sign.

While one mom left, another one entered. Sort of. Today (as in the 3rd of April) was my mom's birthday. I didn't get a chance to call her earlier in the day, but I knew that I could call her in the evening as she would probably be up late anyhow. So I called her just moments ago to wish her a happy birthday. Typical of my mom, she didn't care that my phone call to her was on the late side. She was just happy to hear from me. Woods even got into the spirit of things to wish her a feliz cumpleaños.

I wish I had been there to celebrate her b-day this evening. From what I was told, the whole fam was there - my nana, brother, sister, niece, tias, tios, and so on. But personally, the icing on the cake would have definitely been the six large Peter Piper pizzas she had for the party. The minute she told me over the phone what they had to eat, I became envious. I love me some Peter Piper's. Oh well, I will have my time with Peter Piper's again the next time I go to Tucson. *mouth waters*

Overall, I am happy my mom celebrated her "Born Day" (thanks Sims) in her own way and Woods' mum enjoyed the company of her sons and myself. In simple terms, it turned out to be a great day in the "Mothers of Homosexuals" department. Woot!

Friday, April 03, 2009

Is It Finished Yet?

It's 6.37am on Friday morning. I haven't been to sleep yet. I'm tired, hungry, exhausted, and cranky. A beautiful combination really.

I've been up all evening with Woods straighten up the living quarters in preparation for a visit later today from his mum and brother who is in from Texas. And by straighten, I don't mean just cleaning up the mess on the floor, I mean full on hiding the flyer of that muscle guy's hole hovering over the kitchen table. It's mainly about respect, but also a bit about being too flamboyant with the gayness around Woods' fam. That kind of limitations is somewhat new to me as with my mom you don't have to prance around the fact that we are both cocksuckers. I will give Woods' mum tons of credit tho as she has warmed up to me since the intial meeting - but then again, she hasn't seen the side of me that brings nutbags like Toxic Waist to the surface. But luckily, I doubt she ever will. *erk*

Well, despite that I have been up the entire evening, the house is no where near presentable. I am going to forgo the stress and get some shut eye. I'll pick up where I left off sometime around 10:30am. Cross your fingers that I complete the purification of the spaces. Lord knows I am going to need all the help I can get to get this shit done.